Hfeather53

feathered and flowered

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Untitled by Hfeather53, literature

nursery rhymes by Hfeather53, literature

no, i'm not ok by Hfeather53, literature

Untitled by Hfeather53, literature

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a fine fine line by enigmaticsmile, literature

like magic by YouInventedMe, literature

Literature

like magic

if you can't leave 'em with a laugh you can leave 'em sawed in half I'm hoisting the white flag and hanging it half-mast see I've got past experience I know the shape of a casket keep the question on your tongue it doesn't mean you didn't ask it I'm composed of screeching static a vaguely man-shaped panic underneath all the anxiety the depression's feeling manic like whoa there partner wait your turn we've got another bridge to burn and contents of a leaky gut to empty up here in the churn forty years all haunted by the specters of the spectrum unsure which monsters mean him harm and which want to protect him either way he's gobbled up a hollow bag of bones to crunch here lies the living memory of a life completely motherfucked spent a decade seeking comfort in the powders and the potions and hands that turned to sand gone sifted when he tried to hold em now he's shifted or replaced all of the idols on his totem but no bell's ever been unrung sometimes broken

fig. 01: the angel by gliitchlord, literature

Literature

fig. 01: the angel

a. silent, 'neath surface turbulent, and aware of the shipwreck; an impossible grace that flickers within eyes panicked. b. she blacked out before she hit the water, thrown violently overboard by the tempest. submerged for some seconds before a gravity reversed, dragging her body to shore. c. where they meet, eyes locked with flushed cheeks. she can't believe this bright angelic scene. silk hand on her throat, she does not scream, she hopes her thanks radiates to this being. d. myth lips glide closer to her, humans are such strong reflections when not armed; belligerent shapes of water asking for more, for god, for mercy. e. for this pass

growing pains by YouInventedMe, literature

DLDs and DDs

ocean lungs by Hfeather53, literature

Literature

ocean lungs

you weigh something like gravity in my tired expanse. you are sand; (my once splendid mountain) my love is the ocean that has worn you down. with my monstrous tongue, i pulled you in. as you fall, sweeping peacefully into the depths and filling each crevice, i am learning to inhale shores. some would say i'm suffocating and bring me buckets of air (only to have it escape my slippery grip). no, the tides need something heavy to make of her a home.

desiccate by Hfeather53, literature

Literature

desiccate

i. you were 22 years in the making, a sponge without water since the day they plucked you from the ocean and left the sea salt to sink into your pores. ii. I was something too heavy to wade in, barely able to breathe, 21 years in the making with floodgates barring my emotions since the age of four. iii. At the first sign of droplets, the salt of you drew me in and eased the heaviness of my heart. iiii. In your confessions of self-love, in your tales of embrocation, I was only ever your liniment; our brevity was a thing to be forgotten from the start.

summer home by Hfeather53, literature

Literature

summer home

i've rearranged the rooms of my chest to make room for you. i won't say it didn't hurt to make myself your Adam; removing rib after rib until you found a comfortable perch. there, beneath my unguarded breast, you construct your nest of every lovely thing you've come to love about me (while the rest of me flaps wildly like moth wings against the cold walls of my exposed heart). i should've known you'd leave when winter froze me. don't apologize [for the ache]. you kept the beautiful bits of me warm (while they died).

to be a florist by Hfeather53, literature

why we're made with holes by Hfeather53, literature

and I still keep running into parked cars by Hfeather53, literature

Literature

and I still keep running into parked cars

Mama, your baby girl's swimming in dead of the night hair, scarred knees, overgrown weeds, and countless pairs of shoes- with those orange and yellow wheels that hug my toes and heels I'm running into parked cars trying to get my kite to fly and hiding under dashboards listening to you fight I'm rummaging through boxes of secrets that Daddy tried to hide- solving puzzles with pieces I'll never uncover in these thoughts of you

Deviation Spotlight

faithful and quietly distant by Hfeather53, literature

Literature

faithful and quietly distant

i was given a belly of rocks; each stone asks, "plant me," so i do. each spring blesses me with the same stony seeds, and i thank the god of my childhood for his faithfulness - i continue to dig up what i've buried, but i wonder, what of the blood from labor-worn fingers and the sweat and the lust that i've spilled each season - where is my return on that? the god of my adulthood stays silently distant while i groan along with the pebbles, "use me?" and i dig, and i dig. "use me," the rocks cry and i join them, begging the dirt for kindness and the heavens for answers the earth has swallowed and yet to spit-up.

faithful and quietly distant

Hfeather53

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About Hfeather53

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Artist // Hobbyist // Literature

May 25, 1983
United States
Deviant for 16 years
She / Her

My Bio

Never gonna leave this bed. by Gingershots

:thumb325746507:

These people are amazing for various reasons and you should visit their galleries and show them all !!!

Favourite Movies

Romantic ones...

Favourite TV Shows

Six feet under, heroes, house, the office, alias, the big bang theory, Baka and test, fairy tail...

Favourite Bands / Musical Artists

Radiohead, muse, sia, Fiona apple, nin, the fray, Coldplay, maroon5, ke$ha, rihanna

Favourite Books

unwritten ones

Favourite Writers

passionate ones

Favourite Games

love

Favourite Gaming Platform

hearts

Tools of the Trade

Me, him, you

Other Interests

People

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Hfeather53

Jun 9, 2022

hello, words

2 min read

i haven't written in a while, i think my meds are helping me sort my feelings into thoughts for the first time in a while... when your emotions are the ocean, and you're just a granule of sand, it's hard to decipher one thing from the next. everything is wet. everything is saturated. everything is hurt, and ache, and stabbing pain. you can't breathe and at the same time your chest is on fire. there's an entire fucking ocean holding you down. i apparently have ocd. not so much the c part - not a lot of compulsion... unless it's sex... or spending... or starving myself... or over exercising and counting calories. lots of obsessive thoughts. turns out it's not suicidal ideation... or it is? but it's from ocd. anyway, now that they've changed my meds it helps with the suicidal thoughts... but i can hear everything else again and all of that just makes me want to die so i'm not sure it helps? baby's first journal/writing in a long while. i missed the solace of words. you ruined that

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Hfeather53

Sep 23, 2019

Devious Journal Entry

0 min read

help me feel anything.

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Hfeather53

Aug 20, 2019

updates

0 min read

i started a new job at a bank. it's not the worst thing i've ever done and i like my coworkers. it's not horribly stressful and the learning curve isn't super steep. but they're already talking about the possibility of promoting me which is terrifying. it would come with more responsibility and i feel like i can only manage myself at this point and not others. while i am flattered that they think i'm a human and capable of doing these things, i don't know how to respectfully decline. so i just nodded and smiled. maybe i'll be shit at sales and they can like realize i'm not worth promoting. i'm still waiting on disability in the meanwhile.